June 20, 2012

WTF Wednesday: Faster Than You Can Say “Robotic Death Panels”, Here’s a Robot That Calmly Guides You Into the Sweet Hereafter.

Filed under: WTF Wednesday — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , — ex-boyfriend @ 4:49 pm

You’ve heard about hospice cats, right? The adorable little reapers that offer purrs and cuddles to the mostly-dead in exchange for climate control and 2 square meals a day (or 5, if you’re a spoiled quadruped around here that refuses to eat more than 1 Tbsp in a sitting)?

Well, “Chen”, a pretentiously-mononym-ed RISD student, has developed a less cute, more terrifying version: meet the Last-Minute Robot.

Just press a button, and this cold, lifeless robotic arm will slowly move back and forth across the patient’s arm, “stroking [them] through death” while calmly introducing itself via an eerily Siri-esque voice (insert “are you there, Siri? It’s me, Matt” joke here).

Two things:

1. If I’m going to kick it with zero friends and/or family surrounding/petting/hugging me, I want a goddamn cat, not a robot.
2. If anything is going to be “stroking me through death”, it had better be something fried and delicious!

(Via LikeCool.com)