From Japan, of course, you can now get a remote control broom and waste basket. I am not sure how well this would really clean but if you’re too lazy to get off your couch and instead use remote control cleaning tools you can’t be that particular about the quality of clean you’re going to get.

Three words: Puppet Horror Movie!

Sweet dreams, muppets!

Sorry for the prolonged radio silence (radio? WTF’s a radio, old man?!), but we were in NYC all last week and this past weekend for New York Comic Con, and it’s taken me two whole days to properly decompress and catch up on things here in Ex-Boyfriend HQ. Selling tees, subsisting on soft pretzels, drinking yourself to sleep — you know, BIZNESS. Earnin’ that dolla-dolla bill. Kitty needs a new pair of kitten mittons.

Anyway, we have lots of pictures to share, and great stories (remind me to tell you about the cab I shared with the coked-out CPA in Hoboken who decided it was better to ask me if I was a cop AFTER he took a HUGE snort from his little phial. It was all very American Psycho.)

In the meantime, enjoy this supremely disturbing video of a belly-dancing wookie. Remember — once you’ve seen it, you can’t UN-see it!

(Via Vulture.com, by way of Adj!)

This is just surreal — a security firm called HALO Corp. is actually including emergency zombie outbreak training in their upcoming annual counter-terrorism summit, which will be attended by over 1,000 military, law enforcement, medical, and federal personnel. Admittedly, they are being tongue-in-cheek about the whole thing, explaining that it’s merely a fun way to engage in a pandemic training scenario, but this is a bit too meta for even my liking.

“HALO Corp.”? Seriously? I feel like I’m being punked by my brother Tom and his LAN party friends. Regardless, remember to always aim for the head.

(Via Huffington Post)

Every single part of this video of Nekrogoblikon’s “No One Survives” is hilarious, but here are some highlights and Easter eggs:

• The bartender at Carlito’s Way is Jon Lajoie, aka Taco from FX’s The League
• The object of the goblin’s affection is, errmm, adult film star Kayden Kross
• If you go to the YouTube page, you can read the full lyrics. They are pretty typical for metal, but here’s a wonderful taste:

We used to laugh, we used to cry,
Now the only thing we do is die!

Oh, metal — you’re the bestest!

Robotic exo-suit controlled via Kinect gaming platform OR 3G smartphone app with modular weaponizing capability that is “priced to own” at “only” $1.35 million = Bad Idea Jeans, Japan.

Thanks very much, but I like my advanced machinery a little more Hedonismbot and a little less Dildozer.

(Via Springwise.com)

Once again, Science brings us technology that’s both fascinating and terrifying — you know, like train wrecks can be.

This time University of Florida scientists created a “brain” in a dish from cultured rat cells and then used said “brain” to control an F-22 fighter jet simulator. Although the story has been kicking around for several years, it only caught the internet’s (and my) attention recently.

First off, how insulting must this be for our human fighter pilots? Secondly, if there’s one thing we’ve learned over the last decade, it’s that human-operated drone strikes are not perfect. What makes Science think that putting drone strikes in LESS capable hands (or alpha waves or synapses or whatever) is going to improve that?

The class of 2012 is looking pretty rough right now, Science. Thus far you’ve given us mass-killing mutant rat brains and a Dorito-flavored taco shell, with NASA’s successful Martian landing two weeks ago as your only showing in the “Win” column. We’re already halfway through August, guys. Time to wow me.

(Via The Atlantic)

Want to have your dystopian future Minority Report-style paranoia stoked? Check out this story about how scientists are developing mind reading technology.

Currently scientists are able to read brain scans from monkeys and see what the monkeys are going to do before they do it. Thanks again, science. Can’t wait for this technology to be unleashed at every job interview, airport security checkpoint and traffic light on the planet. How about you spend less time trying to read my mind and make with the hover boards!

Via Fork Party

*SHUDDER* So much wookie thrusting — make it stop…

(Via Stuff I Stole From The Internet, by way of Adj!)

WOW.

I really just do not know where to begin with this. Not just in terms of snarky commentary, either — I’m having trouble just digesting this as an individual consumer of movies.

First, understand: I think RZA is something of a musical genius. As far as hip-hop production goes, he is up there with DJ Premier, Prince Paul, Dan The Automator, and maybe (MAYBE) DJ Shadow as far as I’m concerned. I love Wu-Tang, and even his comedic acting cameos in Coffee & Cigarettes, Funny People, and especially the ‘Wu-Tang Financial’ skit on Chappelle’s Show are freaking amazing.

And on the surface, this is the sort of movie that seems like it was developed in a lab for me and my friends: Tarantino is involved, RZA does the soundtrack, and there are copious amounts of bloodletting. Meredith will be the first to tell you about my love of cinematic decapitations.

Still, there’s a strong whiff of “movie-jail” here, but for now let’s just bathe in the nonsensical, ultra-violent glory of this red-band trailer:

• RZA is an African-American blacksmith in China during what appears to be late-19th century China.
• Despite the period, every character eschews the efficiency of guns for ornate bladed weapons, including token-grizzled-white-gaijin Russell Crowe.
• Everyone speaks perfect(ish) English, regardless of cultural origin. Ken Watanabe is as close as we get to a plot-relevant accent.

That’s a LOT of suspension of disbelief. Still, I was pleasantly surprised by Inglorious Basterds; let’s hope this can do the same.

(Via Vulture.com, by way of Adrienne’s RSS feed)