Mens Health recently put out a list of the 20 worst beverages in America. Any by worst, they mean the worst for you. The winner: Cold Stone Creamery’s PB&C, which weighs in at 2,010 calories and 131 grams of fat! Having just returned from vacation, I’m watching my diet for the next few weeks, so clearly Cold Stone is out. (Vacations always lead to high calorie restaurant food and excessive quantities of beer and liquor.) So what are the most diet-friendly drinks?
1. Champagne – 4 ounces contains 85 calories
2. Vodka and Fresca – 1 ounce vodka contains 64 calories and since Fresca is a diet soda it’s calorie-free
3. Gin and Tonic – 1 ounce gin and 3 ounces of tonic comes to about 100 calories
4. Rum and Diet Coke – Averages at about 110 calories
5. Mojitos -If made properly they contain about 160 calories (it should have 2 tsp sugar, 3 Tbs lime juice, 1.5 oz light rum, club soda and fresh mint)
6. Bloody Mary – Usually contains around 150 calories
7. Wine – 5 ounces contains 120 calories
8. Mike’s Hard Lemonade Light – 11 ounces contains 98 calories
9. Budweiser Select55 – 55 calories
10. Jack and Coke (Zero) – 1 ounce of Jack Daniels contains 64 calories, the Coke Zero is calorie-free
Everything I know about breast fashion protocol I’ve learned from my wife and I always thought visible nipples was something to avoid. There are products for this! A lot of products for this! So you can imagine my confusion when I found this little gem.
Body Perks Nipple Enhancers proudly proclaims “Nipples are in.” And if you don’t like what nature gave you, hook yourself up with some Nipple Enhancers, ladies.
Pandas are the most ridiculous animals under the sun. Just look at this mom chilling out eating some bamboo when her little one lets out a sneeze. Naturally she reacts with fright, like a crazy panda. Then returns to eating her bamboo. Priceless.
This* might be the most ingenious plan ever to drive up tithing at church; market God’s love to people that are already up early on Sundays — the poop-scooping demographic.
Initially I was surprised that this was a church in Massachusetts; proselytizing is usually the province of Southerners. But then, those unitarians episcopals are nothing if not inclusive. That said, where’s the special service for cat owners? The way my boys act, they could use a dose of religion every now and then.
*Note the irony in The Salem News using a witch on a broomstick as its logo. I’m sure those Puritan girls burned at the stake 400 years ago are chuckling about this down in Hell.
There is so much going on here, I don’t even know where to start. Someone tipped over a UPS truck and this guy is taking a sewing machine to prom? WTF? Add your captions below.
There’s a very fine line between precocious and pretentious. Some would say they’re one and the same, but I like to believe that precociousness implies a certain naivete that gets washed away in the transition to pretension. While I have a sneaking suspicion that xOphoeniXfeath3r probably falls on the wrong side of that fence, I can’t help but hope that she’s just some smart kid who is self-aware and self-deprecating. If you check out some of her other vlog posts, it’s hard not to catch a whiff of drama geek. Charming!
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