I know, I know there are so many kitty ipad videos out there. They’re all so cute though. Check out this little guy:

This is an actual sign in my neighborhood. I chuckle every time I pass it and imagine a giant cthulhu monster folding shirts.

This week is dragging and I could go for a tall cold glass of something right about now. Perhaps a grapefruit margarita. Here’s how to make one:

Ingredients:
Wedge of lime
2 teaspoons coarse margarita salt
14 ounces ruby red grapefruit juice, with pulp (about 3 medium grapefruits)
1 ounce lime juice
5 ounces tequila
2 ounces triple sec
4 slices grapefruit or twists

1. Rub the lime wedge around the rims of 4 margarita glasses. Dip in salt and set aside.

2. Combine half the juices, tequila and triple sec in a cocktail shaker with ice.

3. Shake until chilled and then pour into 2 of the glasses.

4. Garnish with a twist or slice of grapefruit.

5. Repeat to make two more cocktails.

Recipe via LA Times

Who needs actual friends, lovers, and family? This is the 21st century! You can buy anything on the internet these days.

1. Handy Man Honeys
Ladies, we all know men are only good for a few things like taking out the trash and fixing stuff, amiright? Lord knows you can’t unclog your own sink, but does that mean you should have to live with some man leaving socks on your floor and hogging your remote.

Luckily, you can now rent a boyfriend. He’ll come over to remodel your kitchen and then go home to watch the game at his house. It’s the best of all worlds.

2. Lady Friends
So you’re a sinfully unattractive jerk and you have no friends. Don’t let that stop you from scoring with chicks. Simply hire a wing woman. No doubt that a ringing endorsement from a hot babe will attract other ladies like moths to a flame.

Don’t worry, it’s not at all strange to show up to a bar with a girl who hits on girls for you. It’s in no way creepy and it will totally get you laid.

3. Make Believe Children
Sick of your co-workers always getting to leave the office early for little Caitlin’s dance recital? Tired of them always working from home because little Maddox has the sniffles? Maybe you’ve considered having children to get out of workplace responsibilites but aren’t really interested in the additional expense and hassle of a family. Now you can order an “Office Kid“. This kit comes with a picture of your fictional child and adorable crayon drawing by him or her. All so you can convince co-workers that you’ve got a parent teacher conference, when really you just want to head out for happy hour.

Add your captions below

In a little over 2 weeks I’ll be on vacation! So excited. We are going to London, Amsterdam and Reykjavik. (Assuming Icelandic volcanoes don’t ruin our plans. Fingers crossed.) I am completely overwhelmed by London night life options because they all sound totally bizarre and amazing. Here are a few of the options I’m considering:

Cellar Door – Sounds like a trip back in time to the Speakeasy era, complete with burlesque, swing era jazz and old school martinis. They even have burlesque afternoon tea!

Madame Jojos – Cabaret shows on Saturday nights, amazing sounding DJ nights.

Voupte Lounge – More cabaret and burlesque and it’s a supper club!

Licking Wounds 2 – described as “car crash, rage-fuelled, issue-based comedy. Even when it goes horribly wrong, which it occasionally does, it’s always horribly funny.”

69 Colebrook Row – bespoke cocktails. I am drooling over their menu

Proud Cabaret’s Swinging Burlesque Boudoir – “decadent jazz, vintage strip-tease and wild swing dancing. This revue presents 1930’s burlesque, hot solo Charleston and vernacular jazz dance, body burning and fire tassels, burlesque’s answer to Billie Holiday, Lindy Hop, traditional belly-dancing, and a sparkling champagne-soaked finale”

Supper Club – Described as a “high-definition advert from the future” in stark white. “Instead of being seated at tables or chairs or other formulaic furniture, punters take their shoes off and recline on enormous white mattresses. Silky mouthfuls of food and designer drinks are whisked to each bed by staff wearing fancy dress – examples include a burlesque angel, a bellboy and a bullfighter.

The bouncers look like the Bee Gees, there’s ‘creative’ visuals splashed on one of the white walls; a pair of dancing robots jerk around near the decks; the music is loud and beepy, diners are given massages and cajoled by a man whose job, it seems, is to jump around and laugh a lot – it’s the kind of place you’d expect a unicorn to walk in”

I tend to like weird stuff. I actually found even weirder options than these but nudist night club sounded a little too real, even for me.

Have any of you been to these places? Which ones do you guys think sound most spectacularly strange and awesome?

P.S. I designed a new tee over the weekend. Check it out:

Check out this adorable baby ‘roo frolicking in the ocean. Via Fork Party

Due to a super busy week I’ve fallen behind on posting around here so even though I am actually writing this on a Friday, we’ll pretend it’s Thirsty Thursday. Time travel, y’all!

Alright, I read two cool boozy tidbits this week I thought you guys would like. First the kitch’n demystifies the 3 martini lunch. You know how we always here tales of our grandpas having 3 martinis at lunch? Like me, you probably always wondered, how did they not finish their meal barfing on their shoes?

The answer: portion size! In grandpa’s day a martini was just a scant 2 or 3 ounces of liquor. In our modern super-sized world a martini is typically 10 ounces. Yeesh!

Alrighty… one other thing I found this week that was neat: A Bartender’s Guide to Bitters. 5 leading brands described. Not all bitters are created equal.

Bottoms up

Check out Knut hamming it up for his fans. Add your captions for this photo below.

The MD SPCA’s March for the Animals was yesterday. I am pleased to report that I was able to raise $1,310.00 for them this year. A big thanks to my friends, family and Ex-Boyfriend customers who made donations, spread the word about this fundraiser and purchased bottle openers to support the cause. Below are a few pictures of some of the cute critters that came out for the event.

The party was pretty dog-centric, but I guess kitties aren’t known for getting out and about. That said, some critters just love to defy the norm. Thus, I love this story about Kitty. She’s on a 3 year hike with her humans across the Americas. She spends her days chilling under an umbrella attached to her human’s back pack. Adorable! This is one well-traveled kitty.